By: Sabby Foden

Grief is a profound, disorienting experience that upends every aspect of life—emotional, physical, and financial. In her book My Husband Died, Now What?, Debra L. Morrison, CFP®, offers a compassionate yet practical roadmap for women navigating the challenges of widowhood. Drawing on over four decades of financial expertise and firsthand service to grieving families, she combines tools for emotional healing with critical financial guidance that can make the difference between stability and struggle.

Writing Through Difficult Memories

For Debra, writing this book was not simply an academic or financial exercise. It brought her face-to-face with the deep pain she has witnessed over the years. Serving six widows, one widower, and a twelve-year-old orphan pro bono after the 9/11 tragedies left a lasting impression. Many of these families were young, without adequate life insurance, and left in devastating circumstances.

“The unspeakable shock of that tragedy was all the more poignant because so many survivors’ loved ones were not recovered,” Debra recalls. “They didn’t even have the closure of holding a hand one last time.” Reliving those memories made the writing process emotionally taxing, yet she knew the lessons drawn from those experiences could help others who find themselves in sudden and overwhelming grief.

Slowing Down the Rush to Act

One of Debra’s central messages is that newly widowed women must resist the urge to make significant decisions too quickly. “There seems to be a notion that many decisions are essential after a woman suffers the death of her husband, and that is completely false,” she explains.

In the early weeks and months of grief, widows are often in a mental fog, overwhelmed by emotions and unable to think clearly. Rather than rushing to “fix” things, she encourages women to feel whatever they are feeling, forgive themselves for forgetfulness or confusion, and permit themselves to change their minds without judgment.

Rethinking Financial Literacy for Women

Financial literacy is often touted as the answer for women’s financial challenges, but Debra pushes back on this one-size-fits-all prescription. She points out that many mature women were socialized to stay out of economic matters entirely, leaving them vulnerable when thrust into sole responsibility.

“In my 42 years of experience,” she says, “what particularly mature women need is to be respected, and not financially abused by commission-hungry, smooth-talking sales agents.” She stresses that it’s not about forcing women back to the library for years of self-study, but about ensuring they have access to trusted guidance—especially from fiduciary professionals who place their clients’ interests above their own.

Spotting Red Flags in Financial Advice

One of the most practical sections of My Husband Died, Now What? Highlights the red flags widows should watch out for when seeking financial advice. If a so-called advisor leads with selling a product, she warns, that is a significant sign to walk away.

Many predatory advisors use misleading titles or create side companies to appear trustworthy, while still profiting heavily from commissions. The safest test, Debra advises, is to ask directly:

“If I do business with you and at any time in my future with you I purchase a financial, insurance, or investment product, will you make any commission, receive referral fees, or any other remuneration as a result of that purchase?”

If the answer is anything but an unequivocal “no,” it’s time to leave. “Widows can’t afford to make their insurance agent’s or their broker’s boat payment,” Debra says bluntly.

Her emphasis is on working with a Fiduciary CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™ professional, who is legally and ethically bound to put the client’s interests first. In this way, a widow can begin building a relationship of trust, create a plan for a sustainable monthly income, and make adjustments to avoid financial surprises down the road.

Support That Truly Helps

Beyond finances, Debra offers guidance for friends and family who want to support a grieving widow but may not know how. She emphasizes the importance of being proactive with specific offers rather than vague offers, such as “call me if you need anything.”

Instead, suggest concrete options:

• “Can I come mow your lawn on Tuesday or Thursday?” 
• “Would it help if I brought over dinner on Wednesday?” 
• “Could I watch the kids on Monday so you can take a walk?” 

She also suggests thoughtful gestures like mailing a “thinking of you” card with a small spa gift certificate inside, weeks after the funeral, when the influx of support has quieted. These acts remind widows that they are not alone, and that their well-being matters.

Empowerment at the Core

At its heart, Debra’s message is one of empowerment. While the pain of widowhood is immense and undeniable, she believes in the resilience and strength that women can draw upon to move forward.

“If a reader could only take one idea from my book,” she reflects, “it would be this: despite the profound pain of widowhood, a widow has the inherent strength and capability to transform fear and paralysis into empowered navigation and intentional action—making informed choices to rebuild her life and secure her future, with expert financial guidance being a cornerstone of this process.”

A Call for Respect and Support

Ultimately, My Husband Died, Now What? is more than a financial guide—it is a call to respect widows as capable, intelligent individuals who deserve compassion, trustworthy advice, and the space to grieve at their own pace. By combining emotional insight with financial clarity, Debra provides a roadmap for both widows and those who love them, helping transform an overwhelming loss into the first steps toward healing and renewed confidence.

For more information about My Husband Died, Now What?: A Widow’s Guide to Grief Recovery & Smart Financial Decisions, or to purchase the book, visit Amazon.

Disclaimer: This content is for informational purposes only and is not intended as financial advice, nor does it replace professional financial advice, investment advice, or any other type of advice. You should seek the advice of a qualified financial advisor or other professional before making any financial decisions.