By: Joshua Finley

In the fast-paced world of business, where networking and relationship-building are key to success, dining etiquette often takes a back seat to other priorities. However, Phyllis Davis, Founder and Director of the American Business Ethics and Etiquette Trainers Association (ABEETA), stresses that dining is more than just a routine activity involving knives and forks. It is, as she describes, “a relationship-building experience” with multiple touchpoints that can significantly influence professional rapport and success.

According to Davis, being a good dinner guest or host is crucial for creating lasting impressions in business. “Good guests are a valuable asset,” she explains. Whether at a casual luncheon or a formal dinner, guests must demonstrate respect and engagement. This begins with the invitation itself. Davis advises responding promptly to an invitation, ideally within a day or two, as it reflects your reliability and interest. “Your responsibility is to respond as soon as possible,” she notes.

Once at the table, the art of small talk plays a pivotal role. Davis underscores the importance of balanced conversation, explaining that “guests who talk too much or too little are not considered good dinner guests.” She also highlights the need to ask thoughtful questions, which she describes as a way to show curiosity and encourage meaningful interaction. “New research shows that people who do not ask questions are shown not to be curious, which makes you do all the work in conversations,” she points out.

Davis emphasizes that even subtle gestures, such as showing gratitude toward the host and being polite to the waitstaff, can reveal a person’s character. “Your manners with the waiter expose your character to the luncheon guests,” she says, suggesting that kindness and patience are non-negotiable qualities in any professional setting.

Despite the importance of these interactions, many people make mistakes that can hinder relationship-building. Davis identifies common pitfalls, such as discussing inappropriate topics like politics or religion, being overly critical of the service, or using phones at the table. “Using your phone during a meal or laying your phone on the table is inappropriate and rude,” she states.

Dining etiquette also extends to how one interacts during and after the meal. For instance, Davis advises exchanging business cards thoughtfully, without letting them linger on the table and following up with a thank-you note to the host. “Write the people who gave you their card a ‘nice to meet you’ note when you get back to your office,” she recommends, highlighting the importance of sustaining connections beyond the dining experience.

Davis believes these practices are essential across various industries, particularly in sectors that value client relationships and networking, such as financial services, venture capital, and the nonprofit world. In these settings, she asserts, proper dining etiquette is not merely a courtesy but a strategic advantage.

Ultimately, Davis’s insights remind us that dining is more than a meal—it is an opportunity to foster connections, build trust, and demonstrate professionalism. As she aptly puts it, “Good guests are a valuable asset in business.” By mastering the nuances of dining etiquette, professionals can elevate their networking skills and create lasting impressions in their careers.

Published by Elle G